Orgasm is the peak eruption of pleasure from sex play. It is when you do enough nice things to each other in a row – or to yourself – and your body has a big, exciting response to it. Those activities tend to be rubbing, licking, touching or using an object or another person’s body (like a penis or fingers) in a sexual way. Everyone born ‘normally’ is able to have an orgasm, but some people find it harder to get there than others.
The mind has a lot to do with how easily we can orgasm, with anxiety or fear really getting in the way. Girls can start to learn how to orgasm later on in life, whereas boys tend to figure it out pretty quick, with their easy access penises. Everyone benefits from masturbating to learn how to orgasm by themselves.
The female orgasm is the rhythmic contractions of muscles in and around the vagina and cervix, with feelings of extreme pleasure in the clitoris. There are a variety of different feelings with the female orgasm – some talk about a ‘vaginal orgasm’ or a ‘clitoral orgasm’, despite there being no precise definitions for these things, and technically, no such thing as either. An orgasm is an orgasm, so take what you can get!
There are thought to be about 26 different types of orgasm that a woman can experience – that’s pretty cool. If you take a look at the actual extent of the clitoris, you can see why:
We’ve put together a few videos about the orgasms so you can get a better idea of what’s going on.
Guys have orgasms and ejaculate, which are not always mutually exclusive though when you start out, you will generally see these two things happening at the same time – when a guy ‘cums’, semen squirts out the end of his penis.
This is full of live sperm that is designed to get ladies pregnant, so before having any sex, investigate birth control and learn how to use a condom. A guy can have a ‘dry’ orgasm without ejaculation (and have multiple orgasms), or he can ejaculate without orgasm.
Orgasm releases lots of hormones and chemicals that make us feel good, some of which cause us to bond with one another, like oxytocin, and dopamine, which makes us feel happy. It’s like a drug, which is why people love sex! It makes us feel happy and connected.